Meet me at the well.....

Holy moly, tonight is a big night. Tonight is the night where I meet my boyfriend's parents for the first time. MIERDA! My entire insides have been shaken up since I woke this morning. First, I had to say goodbye to him, because he is going home for 2 weeks. After he left, I became such a woman. See, for those of you who don't really know me, I pride myself on having a "small vagina" as me and my friends call it. I am not like most women, honestly. I grew up with mostly males as friends. So, after he left, I layed on the ground for like 20 minutes and cried. Oh man, do I hate crying. And it wasn't the good cry, either. It was so unattractive. I just thought about how I would go two weeks without staring into his blue eyes, or without his amazing bear hugs, or his random kisses on the forehead. And that was the time my vagina grew, and I was a major woman. So, I cried for a bit, and then ended up crying myself back to sleep. Yeah, it was pretty lame. I can admit to that.

Well, I woke up and began to get ready for the day, as panic mode set in. I started going through my clothes, and I couldn't find anything good enough to wear. Ugh, this is too casual. Yikes, this is much too skankalicious! Ew, I look fat in this. Oh, wait, I am fat. It was so dumb. I mean, in the first place, we are going to a cheesy Mexican restaraunt called El Zarape. Don't get me wrong, this place rocks. But it is still cheesy, as are most American attempts at a Mexican restaraunt. And just so you know, employing Mexicans to work there so DOES NOT make it authentic.

So, I am at the point of no return. I just keep pictuting the first interaction between myelf and the Waltons (no joke, they are the Waltons). I see me extending my hand to Greg, saying "Nice to meet you." And then I imagine him sneering down at me, thinking of me as trash. I have this fear (probably irrational) because Alex and I come from much different worlds. Seriously. I was raised in Section 8 housing, him in much nicer areas. I had many family issues growing up, and he has a great family that has always promised to take care of him. I come from a very liberatarian home, his is most likely more conservative. He doesn't show his emotions much, and I wear them on my sleeve. Shoot, I think I might wear them even more out there then my sleeve.

The fact of the matter is, him and I are complete opposites. I have tattoo's and piercings, I am loud, somewhat obnoxious, poor, a college drop out (who is enrolled back in school, thankyouverymuch). I fear being inferior, not being good enough for his family. The big issue is is that I want to spend the rest of my life with this man, so his family HAS to approve of me. I am just under so much pressure right now.

Dang it, I need a cigarette.

And I promised myself that I would spend the entire day preparing. No Facebook, no e-mail, no blogger. Well, that one failed right away. I needed to get out my fear. And to make matters worse, I have Alex's annoying friend Vidas randomly IM'ing me. Where is Alex? Why isn't he answering his phone? Can you try calling him for me? It is important. I am about to strangle this kid. Okay, I need to get off my bum, and get moving. He will be here in an hour and a half, and I must look my best. I have come down to the decision that I am not wearing make-up. I never wear it on a daily basis, so I want them to get an idea of what I am really like.

Now, where is that cigarette?